what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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