It's Friday. Sex?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
