ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.