Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It all started with a game of naked twister.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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