i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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