There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
