No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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