Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
