I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
