I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
There r osticjed everywhere
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
