Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
