Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize