I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
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Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
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Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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