So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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