Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
