So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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