What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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