You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
