Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
