I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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