finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Reggie can tackle my bush.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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