I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Randomize
