Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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