You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize