You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize