At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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