No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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