fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
