This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize