i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
