Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize