the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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