Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize