Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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