well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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