the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
