I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
