420 ftw
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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