that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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