Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
They took my balls.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
