id be glad to
one might say we're banned from that church
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
