Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
