I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
