life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
