there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
