My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
