whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize