I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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