JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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