Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
