I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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