Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
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